When accidents happen

I want to erase this image from my memory so bad, why can't that possible? I swore I would NEVER let my baby get hurt EVER and I made it 7 1/2 months, but Brayden fell out of his swing today. I was not in the room when it happened. He went from what I thought wasn't falling asleep to screaming the loudest he ever has on the floor underneath it. I feel like the worst Mother in the world right now when just right before I felt like the best Mother in the world. He has already had a tough time this morning from having a fever and cough to being woken up 30 minutes into his first nap by the stinkin' poop fairy. (literally) And the swing was the way to calm him down so he could get back to sleep to finish his nap. I now hate the stupid baby ransacker. He fits in it just fine but the straps don't fit around him any more because they made them too slappin' small. I want to report it to the company, seriously! So I put on the lap tray and until today it's always kept him in and secure. Some how he figured out how to climb out, the obvious. Now I know it's time to retire the stupid thing and take it to the basement, although I'd much rather set it on fire and kick it around some. I'm so upset and have too many emotions running through me. Oh, and so you don't go freaking out Brayden is fine. Not a scratch or bump on him. Thank you God! Although our babies are super curious and at times get into mischief, their Mommy's constant prayers keep them safe and protected. I really want to feel better already. But it's just not in me to forgive myself for not watching him constantly. They say it's impossible but bow I feel like from now on I HAVE to. It's the only way I can start to feel like the best Mommy again. I want that feeling back. :(